The Anniversary

On March, 21st, 2013, my husband and I got the devastating news that we had suffered a miscarriage and had lost our third baby. 

Even with the passage of time, my heart still hurts. 

I didn't know our baby's heart stopped beating when it did. It wasn't until our 16 week prenatal check up that we found out that the tiny life we loved so much was already gone. No warning, no signs, no symptoms. Just gone!

I believe I've built up hate in certain areas of my life out of guilt, ignorance and fear. I believe I've squashed emotions for so long that it has festered inside like a cancer. Letting it out in healthy ways through crying, talking, writing, and simply acknowledging that I'm overwhelmed helps. Every now and then I find myself crying. The girls see it, even though I try to hide it. My oldest gives me hugs and says, "It's okay, Mommy. Don't cry."
Every now and then Samantha brings things up like, "Remember that time we were at the doctor's and the baby in your belly was gone."
Yeah, not fun hearing, and certainly not fun explaining all that to a 4 year old. 

This past year I've certainly had my moments of hate.  I've also had my moments of love and acceptance. I hope that I am headed toward a place where the love will outweigh the hate. 

My girls, My husband, My family, My friends - they have nothing but genuine love to give and that makes life SO much easier to cope with!  

I must admit to something-- I didn't have much knowledge about miscarriages quite a few years ago. I don't know if it was just plain idiocy or just completely uneducated. It was about 6 years ago that I got a dose of what miscarriage really was by losing a niece/nephew at 12 weeks GA. I wasn't sure how to react or how to comfort someone dealing with such a tragedy. I figured they would just want their distance and they'd come to me if they wanted to talk and grieve.  Most of the time, that's not the case!!!! They NEED people in their life to GO to them to talk, and give them comfort. So PLEASE, if you know of someone dealing with a loss, reach out and help as much as you can! You have NO idea how much your warmth and kindness will help in such a tragic situation!! 

We miss our little angel! 

We can only hope and pray that God is taking care of her/him, along with every other angel baby!

Summer Coming To a Close

We've had quite an interesting summer this year! It has been crazy busy!! We've been to Adventureland, Johnson County Fair, Samantha and I went to see Monsters University, As a family we went to see Despicable Me 2, a lot of swimming, a lot of ice cream, trips to the library, couple fishing trips, princess photo shoot and parades. We've also made quite a few ER and doctors visits.

We're still staying at Seth's Parent's house. They have been so great with us kind of 'taking over' their house these past few months. Love them to death! We'd be homeless if it wasn't for them.

Things are FINALLY starting to look up for us! On Friday, the 16th, the well & pump guys started fixing our sand point(well). They weren't able to finish that day, but hopefully everything will be finished Monday.

We still have a few things to do before we can move back in. We have to fix our floors(We fixed the hole in our kitchen Saturday morning). We'll just have to fix our whole laundry room floor after the plumbers are finished. We're planning on putting down linoleum instead of the cheap adhesive crap that's in there now. Then we'll have to hook our furnace back up and water heater. Then I'll just have to deep clean the house. Since we had that sewer pipe break there were billions of sewer flies that took over the house, which meant tons of spiders as well. Absolutely disgusting! :/ We're hoping to be home by the end of this week or beginning of the following week! :)

Samantha is doing great! Talkative as ever! She loves singing and dancing, she's ALWAYS singing along to the radio. She's such a goofball. She has a huge imagination. Loves telling stories. She's sooo incredibly excited to start preschool next week. I'm sad, but so happy for her to meet new friends and to take fun field trips. Her teacher will be Mrs. Eaton. She seems like a wonderful teacher. We have heard great things about her. We have an ice cream social to go to Monday night. She'll meet her teacher and see her classroom. Her first day will be Tuesday, the 27th. She'll go Tuesdays and Thursdays from 8am-11:45am.

Ella is a spitfire! She's into everything. Loves making messes. So incredibly silly. I do get some cuddles every now and then. ;)  She loves to laugh. Loves to swing. Curious about everything. It's so hard believe that she will be 2 next week :( We're doing a curious george theme birthday party for her this year. She LOVES George! We'll have her party at a park in town. And we got news that my Dad will be coming to her party again this year!! So excited to see him! :D

This has been such an insane summer! I'm ready for it to end and start the fun fall activities! I really hope things keep going in the positive way for us, as well as our whole family! <3 p="">

The hole in the kitchen

The hole in our laundry room
(it's actually bigger now, we had to cut another hole out the other day)

Lots of storytime with Grandma

My chubbers taking a break from swimming

Samantha made some cupcakes with her Aunt Lisa

The girls on the 4th of July

Our Anniversary Dinner

Samantha's princess photo shoot

Ella's photo shoot

Lisa and Samantha at Adventureland

Samantha eating cotton candy at Adventureland

Samantha's Surgery

Samantha had her surgery yesterday for tonsils and adenoids.
We got to the clinic around 7am. They got us back to a room. The nurses talked to us about the surgery and the recovery. The anesthesiologist came in next and talked to us as well. After all the paper work and the talking, it was time for them to take Samantha back to the OR. She was so trusting! The anesthesiologist reached out for her hand and Samantha took it. They left the room and went down a hallway. As Seth, Mom and I watched her walk away from us she turned around and gave us a sad face. It was sooo sad. Mom and I balled our eyes out! :*( But at least Samantha wasn't crying herself. That would have been even harder. But I tell you what, the hardest thing in the world is to let you child just walk away from you knowing what is coming and you can't be there to comfort her.
The nurses took us a post op room where we waited for her. I think we waited a good 45-55 minutes.
The doctor finally came to talk to us and told us everything went great. WHEW!!
So now we waited until they brought Samantha. I heard Samantha's cry and here the nurses come carrying her. I took her and we sat in a chair with her on my lap. She was a little nauseous from the anesthesia. And she ended up throwing up once. :(
She was pretty scared and I'm sure in pain. She kept crying and saying that she wanted to go home. But before we could leave, she had to drink 10 ounces of fluids. She had a Popsicle, some ice cream and a lot of water. It took a couple of hours, but she finally had taken in enough fluids to go home.
We made it home and she seemed to be doing pretty good. She took a little nap. Then after she woke up she started feeling horrible. Wasn't wanting to eat and feverish.
I hope things get better for her! I feel so so bad! :(

Our Bad Luck :/

Lately we've just had the worst luck ever!
We've had a lot of plumbing problems in our home lately. We decided to get it all fixed around the beginning of April. Well, It turns out that it's something MUCH worse than what we expected. Our sewer line in our house has been leaking and we had no idea. We were going to get our sand point(well)/pump fixed/replaced. Well, we can't do that now until we get the sewer line fixed. We decided that our best bet was to get a well outside the house instead of the sand point. I don't think we could do a sand point anymore anyway since that spot has been contaminated with sewage. :/ SO...Basically a $2,000 job turned into a $10,000 job. We're trying to save up some money right now to pay for it all.
All I can say is thank God for Seth's parents!!!!! They have let us stay in their home until everything is all fixed.  It has been really great! The girls get to spend some much needed time with their Grandma, Papa and Aunt Lisa. And I get to spend some much needed time with my Mom. Since she started working we have barely gotten anytime to hang out and talk. So I guess there's some good news in there! :)
After that great news(sarcasm)... Seth tells me that my inner tire rod on my car was shot and needed replaced. So I haven't been able to use my car. But I did make an appointment to get that fixed next week! Can't wait to drive my car again. I love driving Seth's truck, but I HATE that it's such a gas hog!
In the middle of April we all came down with the stomach flu. It was Samantha's first vomiting episode. Poor girl just kept throwing up. :( I felt sooo bad for her! But she did great running to the toilet when she needed to. Then Ella got it the next day, as did I and Mom. Crappiest couple of days ever! I hope none of us have it again for a long time!
Last week we found out that Ella has Croup and her first ear infection. She was pretty dang miserable!! But seems to be doing 100% better this week! She's not the greatest medicine taker at all! So I find myself hiding it in her milk or her yogurt. Her check up is on Friday.
Yesterday we found out more bad news.
Thursday, May 9th, Samantha is scheduled to get her tonsils and adenoids taken out. This girl has some HUGE tonsils!! Even the ENT said they were "humongous"! Just in the past few months they have been giving her a lot of trouble. She has been snoring, which wakes her up at night, coughing, choking on food, not eating as much and has a little pain. I am sooo nervous for her! The recovery won't be fun, But I will be so grateful when this is all over with. Hopefully she'll be a lot happier girl afterward. :) *fingers crossed*
I don't know about you, but I'm ready for some good luck to head our way!!!!

Trying to move forward...

It has been over a month since we found out that our little peanut passed away.
It still feels like we still have so many unanswered questions. The hardest one being that we'll never know what happened.  We'll never know why this happened. We'll never know if the baby was a boy or a girl. It's hard not having that closure.
It has hit me pretty hard lately. I have quite a few friends that's due around the same time I was. They're all finding out the genders and posting belly pictures. Although I am incredibly happy for them, it's just hard to not be able to go through all of that with them.
I was so excited to have a itty bitty baby to hold again. I was really excited about nursing-I was going to try my hardest to nurse as long as baby would let me this time around. I was excited to see the girls with the baby-Samantha has been around a few babies recently and she's so sweet with them. I was excited for welcoming the baby into our amazing family. I was excited for all the smiles and laughter that comes with a brand new baby. I was excited for the cute little clothes. I was excited for labor and having that insanely beautiful moment when baby arrives. So many things I was so excited for and it all just got taken from me-like that!
I have been a little stressed out lately. Seth and I have recently talked about trying for another. He said he would like to have one more. And he'd like to start trying again soon. But he said it's completely up to me on what I wanted to do. I'm really not sure what I want to do. I hate that everything is getting put on me. I hate to think about seeing that disappointed look on Seth's face if I don't want to try again. He's such a wonderful Daddy that he deserves a million kids! I just wish I knew what to do. I'm hoping God will help us make the right decision.
As of right now, I'm trying to move forward and I'm just enjoying my time with my beautiful girls and my amazing husband! I was so sick for about 4 months that I wasn't really able to do much of anything with them all and I missed them so, so much!!!

Our Loss

March 21st, 2013 will be a day that I will never forget.
The girls and I went to my normal 16 week check up. I did the usual weight check and so on. My doctor came into the room and asked how I was feeling. Then she measured my tummy to make sure things are measuring okay, she mentioned that I measured just a little smaller then I should. But she wasn't worried about it. Then she went to listen for the baby's heartbeat. She ended up not being able to find it. I then knew something had to be wrong. She's always able to find the heartbeat right away. She spent a good 5-10 minutes searching for it on the doppler and still couldn't find it. She told me she wanted me to have an ultrasound.
We went to another room for the ultrasound. Then she said the words that will forever be implanted in my head, "Oh shoot...I'm not seeing a heartbeat. I'm so sorry!" I was in absolute shock! I asked all the questions, Why, What happened?? My doctor then told me we may never know what happened, but it's a possibility that my tear from earlier in the pregnancy could have been the cause, but she's not certain. She then told me that she wanted me to have another ultrasound to confirm it. And then she told me that I would have to have an D&C procedure. After the doctor left the room Samantha, bless her heart, says, "Mommy, is the baby gone?". I just lost it!!!
We went downstairs to the radiology place. We waited forever. With two cranky and hungry little girls and a sobbing mother, it was no fun. While we were waiting I decided to make the hardest phone call I have ever made to my husband. It was the hardest 15 minute conversation EVER!
Finally, I got called back to a room for the ultrasound. She confirmed that the baby had no heartbeat. Then she did some measuring and took photos for my doctor. I was told that my doctor would call me in a little while.
I received her phone call about 45 minutes later. She told me the baby measured about 14 weeks. She then proceeded to talk to me about the D&C and we set things up for Tuesday, the 26th.
I've done some research and have asked a few friends that had gone through it. Everyone says it's not too bad physically, but it's pretty tough mentally.
I think the whole hard part right now is waiting. Knowing that I have a dead baby inside me is pretty hard, and not knowing what happened is even harder. I'm still having pregnancy symptoms. I'm still very tired and I've been throwing up every morning. This makes it even tougher that I'm going through all of this for, hate to say it, nothing. I keep thinking to myself, is this something that I did? Is it because I didn't do this or because I did that? What if I did this instead? So many questions and so many unanswered.
Seth has been amazing! We actually sit down and talk about what happened and everything. I'm so glad he's so willing to talk. I know it's hard for the both of us, but I think it's something that we need to do. It helps quite a bit. He's my rock!
Our family and friends that know of what happened have been a true blessing. They've been so great and give us so much love and support. We couldn't get through any of this without them. We love you all so, so much!
I will have an update after my procedure next week.
Please keep us in your prayers!!

15 Weeks

How Far Along: Today I am 15 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013. 

Baby's Size/Other Info: Baby's the size of an orange! The average fetus at 15 weeks weighs 2.5 ounces and measures 4 inches -- and his proportions are becoming even more normal, since his legs now outmeasure his arms.

Baby at 15 weeks

• You probably can't feel it yet, but she's squirming a ton!
• She might even be hiccuping in there.
• She's making lots of progress: her joints and limbs can all move now.

Symptoms: I'm STILL having that yucky gaggy/nausea feeling all day long. I gag at least once a day. No fun! :(

Food Cravings: Meat!  

What I'm Excited About: Not feeling like poo all the time!  

Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Nothing. 

Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs  Today's weight: 118lbs 

Gender Prediction: GIRL! 

Maternity Clothes: Yes and no. I can still wear my "real" pants, but sometimes maternity pants are a bit more comfortable. 
NOTES: My next appointment is March 21st. 

13w3d belly

12 Weeks

How Far Along: Today I am 12 weeks 1 day along. Due date September 4th, 2013. 

Baby's Size/Other Info: Baby's the size of a plum!
The average fetus at 12 weeks is about 2.1 inches long and .49 ounces. Now that she's got pretty much all her parts, her main job is to keep on growing.

Baby at 12 weeks

• Most of her critical systems are fully formed!
• She's about to enter the growth and maturation stage, in which her organs and tissues will grow and develop rapidly.
• She's now developing her reflexes -- if you poke her body, she'll likely move.
• She's opening and closing her fingers and curling her toes, too.
• Her brain is developing fast!

Symptoms: I'm still having that yucky gaggy feeling all day long. It just does not want to go away! :( 

Food Cravings: McDonalds 

What I'm Excited About: To feel like myself again!! 

Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Not much. I decided to purchase some Milkies-Milk Savers (http://www.mymilkies.com/milksaver). I've heard great things about these and can't wait to try them! 

Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs  Today's weight: 118lbs 

Gender Prediction: GIRL! 

Maternity Clothes: Yes! And I did not miss wearing maternity pants! I loathe them! 
NOTES: I had my 12 week check up today(2-21-13). Everything went great. Baby's heartbeat was nice and strong at 168bpm. 

11 Weeks

How Far Along: Today I am 11 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013. 

Baby's Size/Other Info: Baby is the size of a lime! Around 11 weeks, you’ll probably notice some subtle changes, a dark, vertical line appearing down the center of your belly (known as the linea nigra). It’s probably tough to feel calm right now, since your hormones are still haywire and you may still be feeling pretty nauseated. But know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel -- just two more weeks left in trimester one! 

Baby at 11 weeks

• You can't see it, but she's moving fluidly and gracefully in there.
• Her skin is see-through, but she's on her way to looking more like a baby.
• Her fingers and toes aren't webbed anymore.
• Tooth buds, hair follicles and nail beds are forming.

Symptoms: Some nausea(the gaggy feeling), sleepy, sore back/neck, stress and depression(I haven't mentioned the depression much to anyone and I actually debated about mentioning it here. Basically because I didn't want people to judge me. I didn't want people to think that couldn't handle things or that I'm a horrible Mom/Wife/person and since I plan on talking to my doctor about it next week, I've been considering on trying some anti-depressants. Now, I certainly am NOT a fan of taking those drugs, especially while pregnant. But I can't keep doing this to my family and myself. I don't go anywhere, I don't play with the girls :(, I lay on the couch all day, down in the dumps feeling, just hard to smile and joke around. I really DO believe things have gotten better the past few days. I've been feeling good and have felt happier then I have in months!). 
I've also been able to eat really good at dinner the past few days, so that has been nice! I have been only able to have a few bites then be done eating, so its been a nice change! :) I've also been able to FINALLY take my prenatal vitamins without feeling yucky afterward, so that is a plus plus!  

Food Cravings: None really this week.

What I'm Excited About: 2nd trimester!!!!!! Couple more weeks! :) and doctor's appointment next week!

Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Since I KNOW she's a girl, I bought a little sister onesie. :) 

Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs  Today's weight: 117lbs Yay for not losing weight! :)

Gender Prediction: GIRL! 

Maternity Clothes: Not yet. 
NOTES: (You all may not care about this part..lol) Last week was a horrible week for me. I was (TMI) severely constipated on Wednesday. It got so bad that I actually called my doctor, which I VERY rarely do. Then of course the constipation turned into diarrhea for a few days after. I have never experienced that much pain in my life and I do not wish that upon anyone!

Throwback Thursday

These pictures are of my girls EXACTLY one year ago. Just sleeping away and gorgeous as ever! :)

10 Weeks

How Far Along: Today I am 10 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013. 

Baby's Size/Other Info: Baby is size of a Prune! As baby continues her rapid growth and my tummy starts to develop some extra curve. In the process, my ligaments and muscles are starting to stretch, so I shouldn’t be surprised if I start feeling some aches and pains. While, some moms-to-be don’t really get them, others find these sensations -- called “round ligament pain” -- well, downright painful. Breasts have probably gotten bigger too, since they’ve been prepping for breastfeeding for weeks already! That’s why week 10 is probably a good time to stock up on some new, looser clothes. 

Baby at 10 weeks

• Baby has working arm joints, and her cartilage and bones are forming.
• Her vital organs are fully developed and they're starting to function.
• Her fingernails and hair are starting to appear, too.
• Plus, she's swallowing and kicking in there. (Can you believe it?!)

Symptoms: Some nausea, sleepy and (TMI) HORRIBLE Constipation :/ 

Food Cravings: I'm back to chocolate covered strawberries. YUM!!

What I'm Excited About: Hearing baby's heartbeat in a couple of weeks! :) 

Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Nothing this week. 

Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs  Today's weight: 117lbs. Gained 1 pound since last week. 

Gender Prediction: GIRL! 

Maternity Clothes: Not yet. 

9 Weeks

How Far Along: Today I am 9 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013. 

Baby's Size: Baby is size of a green olive! Little embryo has now officially graduated to fetus-hood. And adding to the excitement, a Doppler ultrasound device might be able to 
pick up the beating heart. With basic physical structures in place and increasingly distinct 
facial features, baby is kind of starting to look like... well... a baby!

Symptoms: Just yesterday heartburn started kicking in. Ugh! I certainly didn't miss that! Nausea, low grade fevers, mild headaches, complete exhaustion, lightheadedness/dizzy spells, some crazy emotions(I find myself crying at stupid commercials on tv) and some mild cramping.  

Food Cravings: Just this morning I had a craving for caramel apples! Yummmm!! 

What I'm Excited About: Our next doctor's appointment!!!! We get to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time! That's ALWAYS exciting!! :) AND 2nd trimester!!!!!! 

Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Nothing this week. 

Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs  Today's weight: 116lbs. Lost 1 pound since last week. 

Gender: Still thinking girl. Especially since heartburn has officially roared its ugly head. 

Maternity Clothes: Not quite yet. But I think within the next few weeks they will make their way back into my closet.

9 week belly

8 Weeks

How Far Along: Today I am 8 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013. 
Baby's Size:  Baby is the size of a raspberry! Now she weighs in (yay!) at about .04 ounces and measures about .63 inches. This week, she's growing about a milimeter each day. I can't feel it yet, but she's moving those arms and legs like crazy! Her fingers and toes are now only slightly webbed, and her tail (yes, she had one) is gone! Fun fact: Baby's taste buds are now forming.

Symptoms: I've had a couple of crappy days of morning sickness this week. I have absolutely no energy! Bloated. Cramping every now and then. 

Food Cravings: Wavy chips and dip thanks to a friend of mine! ;) 

What I'm Excited About: Our "first" doctor's appointment is tomorrow! :)  37 days until 2nd trimester! 

Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Nothing this week. 

Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs  Last week's weight: 117lbs. Today's weight: 116lbs. Lost 1 pound. 

Gender: I still think it's a girl. Seth thinks it's a boy. My mother in law thinks it's girl. Samantha thinks it's a girl. :) 

Baby Names: I THINK Seth and I picked out a girls name!!!! I don't think we're 100% about it yet, but we like it and want to discuss it with family before we decide for sure. 

8 week belly

7 Weeks

How Far Along: Today I am 7 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013. 

Baby's Size: A Blueberry. Baby's brain -- both hemispheres! -- is growing fast, generating about 100 new cells every minute. Arms and legs are emerging as joints start to form, and a permanent set of kidneys (baby's third!) is now in place.

Symptoms: Good ole morning sickness. Blech. Lately it has been pretty minimal and manageable though. I make sure to eat a banana right before I get out of bed in the morning. It has helped A LOT!!!! Although, I am starting to get tired of bananas, as long as they help me get through the worst of the morning sickness, which has been the mornings, then I'm happy. I do get spurts of queasiness throughout the day. It's mostly smells that trigger it and if I get REALLY hungry. So I try to eat small meals throughout the day. I haven't had any bleeding or cramping for about a week and a half. I'm having some bloating. And I am soooo tired all day long. I find myself taking naps just about everyday. Ooops.. :) 

Food Cravings: After seeing a commercial last night and seeing this woman enjoying an chocolate covered strawberry, that's all I can think about. It sounds like pure heaven! Other then that, not a whole lot. Well, I guess a big juicy steak doesn't sound too bad right now either. :) 

What I'm Excited About: Our doctor's appointment next week. Not much goes on at the first appointment. But my doctor will let me know if I will need to have another ultrasound to check on my SCH(Subchorionic Hemorrhage). I hope I do! But if not, I'll be okay with that. That just means that everything should be just fine with itty bitty. :) 

Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Nothing really. I did purchase a new nursing cover, which came with reusable breast pads and a bracelet to track when you feed baby and what side baby last fed on. I also purchased a new car seat canopy. I do need to purchase a new car seat and I would like to get a new pack n play. I will be getting a new vehicle soon as well. My car will not fit 3 car seats in the backseat. I never thought I'd say it, but it's time for a van. :) Other then those items, I think we're already pretty prepared for little one. 

Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs  Today's weight: 117lbs. Lost 3 pounds. 

Gender: Of course it's way too early to know yet. My prediction is a girl! No doubts about it! Since this will probably be our last baby. I would really LOVE to have a surprise baby, and not find out gender until baby is born. How fun and nerve wrecking would that be??? lol. We'll have to see if I will have enough strength not to find out. BUT if we do happen to find out, I think it would be a lot of fun to have some sort of "gender reveal" party. 

Baby Names: Boys name is all picked out and has been picked out since before we got pregnant with Samantha. Seth Thomas III. Girls name is a totally different story! We had a heck of time naming Ella. I can only imagine how hard it will be this time. So we have absolutely no clue for girls names. Any help/suggestions would be fantastic!!!!!!!! :) 

7 week belly

Ultrasound

I had my ultrasound today to check and see how the subchorionic hemorrhage was looking. The tech did warn us that we still may not be able to see a heartbeat quite yet, since it's still early. She said typically they don't see a heartbeat until around 6 1/2 weeks. Well, we were able to see one!!!!! :D  The baby looked wonderful! Heartbeat was 124bpm. Baby is measuring right on track from my LMP(last menstrual period). 6 weeks 2 days along. So I'll be due September 4th. 

I talked to my doctor's nurse after my appointment. It turns out that I do still have the subchorionic hemorrhage. I still have to take it easy for another week or two. But it should all heal on its own. 

My next appointment is January 24th. Which is my 8 week appointment. We'll find out then if my doctor wants me to have another ultrasound or not. 

The ultrasound makes everything so surreal. I just can't believe we're going to have 3 little ones running around. God has truly blessed our family!!! 

And I just want to thank my husband for surprising me and showing up at the ultrasound!!! It really made my day. He wasn't sure if he would be able to make it because he had an appointment to go to himself. But he did. And it was a wonderful surprise. :) I have the best husband in the world!!!! 

My Follow Up Appointment

Not a whole lot to update today. 

I had my follow up appointment this afternoon. My doctor checked my cervix and she said everything looked good. I had no cramping today and barely any bleeding. Although after the appointment I had some cramping. But that's normal after an exam.
My doctor wanted me to set up an appointment for an ultrasound at the end of the week. So we'll see how things look on Friday. :) 

Continued prayers would be much appreciated! 

ER Visit

Well we've had a pretty long evening.

This morning I started having really bad cramps. The kind that bring tears to your eyes. But I had no bleeding. So I just kinda brushed it off and it tampered away. I put the girls down for their naps and then I tried to take one myself. I was just getting ready to fall asleep when Ella woke up(Turd!). But she hasn't been feeling so good the past couple of days, so she hasn't been sleeping very well either.

Anyway.. I got her up then I went to the bathroom and there was blood on my underwear. So of course I started freaking out, but then I remembered what happened with Ella and I was kinda reassured that everything still could be okay.

I called Seth(he was out and about). I told him that I started to bleed. So he wanted us to go to the hospital. Seth's Mom came over and picked up the girls, then we headed that way.

The bleeding wasn't heavy, but it wasn't light either. It was enough to worry.

We arrived at the hospital around 5pm. We were seen right away. They took my blood, did a pap(holy crap that hurt!), and I had an ultrasound.

Since I'm only about 5w4d along they weren't able to see much on the ultrasound, since it's still pretty early yet. They didn't even show me the ultrasound screen. So then we headed back to our room and waited for an hour or so for the doctor.

The doctor finally came in and said that everything looked normal. He thinks I had a Subchorionic Hemorrhage. Which is what I had with Ella around the same time(I was around 6 weeks along with Ella when it happened with her). So everything should heal on its own. I have to take it easy for a week or two(which won't happen with 2 little girls and housework that needs done)rest, take Tylenol for the cramping and drink lots of fluids. I have to have a follow up appointment with my OB within the next few days. He also told us that a miscarriage can still happen and if it does there's nothing they can do about(which was so wonderful to hear*sarcasm*).

We finally got out of there around 8:30pm.

I woke up this morning with some mild cramping and some very light spotting. So the bleeding part seems to be tampering off. But the cramping part is still pretty uncomfortable.

I will update when I have my follow up with my OB doctor. :)

Thank you to everyone who prayed for us! We certainly do appreciate it!

Here's some reading material on Subchorionic Hemorrhage.

http://www.whattoexpect.com/pregnancy/pregnancy-health/complications/subchorionic-bleeding.aspx#

~*~SURPRISE~*~

Our Announcement
Photo by: Identity Photography

First Test

It's official 

HERE WE GO AGAIN!!! 

We found out Friday, December 28th that we're expecting #3!!!!!!

I was only one day late and decided just for the fun of it, that I would take a test. Well....SURPRISE!!!!!!!! lol 

I told Seth that evening when he got home from work. I put the test in a box and had him open it. He's super excited!!!! :) And of course my Dad found out then too, since he was staying with us while he was in town visiting for Christmas.

My plan was to tell everyone via facebook with a photo. So I called up my awesome photographer. I met up with her Saturday morning. She then posted our sneak peek Monday evening(Photo above). :)  

We told Seth's parents Saturday night (if they found out via facebook they would hate us forever). I tried to figure out something new on how to tell them. So I printed out pictures of all of their grandkids and put them in frames, and added the pregnancy test picture to the bunch. :) I always LOVE telling Seth's Mom. It's just too much fun!! :D 

 Screaming Grandma #3

                                       

(Check out the other two videos!!! 

Screaming Grandma #1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1aTZ1qtaNo

Screaming Grandma #2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFFvZmeQUzk

We are so incredibly excited!!!! It's so hard to imagine Ella being a big sister and Samantha being a big big sister. :) But we cannot wait!! 

Our first appointment is January 24th. We're hoping to get more information for a due date. We're thinking the beginning of September. Since this is about the same time we found out with Ella too. :) 

I'm feeling okay so far. Few spurts of nausea, and I feel VERY bloated. :/ But that's about it, for now anyway. 

Merry Christmas!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! 

We had such a wonderful Christmas!!! 

My Dad was able to spend the day with us this year. He arrived on Christmas Eve, and stayed the night with us at Seth's parent's house, which we do every year. It was such an amazing day! Samantha was REALLY into Christmas this year. That made this time of year even more magical! 

We are so blessed to have such an amazing family! My girls are so very lucky! 

Our "Christmas Eve Pajama" Picture

Playing with the gifts from Santa

Playing a game of Risk