Samantha had her surgery yesterday for tonsils and adenoids.
We got to the clinic around 7am. They got us back to a room. The nurses talked to us about the surgery and the recovery. The anesthesiologist came in next and talked to us as well. After all the paper work and the talking, it was time for them to take Samantha back to the OR. She was so trusting! The anesthesiologist reached out for her hand and Samantha took it. They left the room and went down a hallway. As Seth, Mom and I watched her walk away from us she turned around and gave us a sad face. It was sooo sad. Mom and I balled our eyes out! :*( But at least Samantha wasn't crying herself. That would have been even harder. But I tell you what, the hardest thing in the world is to let you child just walk away from you knowing what is coming and you can't be there to comfort her.
The nurses took us a post op room where we waited for her. I think we waited a good 45-55 minutes.
The doctor finally came to talk to us and told us everything went great. WHEW!!
So now we waited until they brought Samantha. I heard Samantha's cry and here the nurses come carrying her. I took her and we sat in a chair with her on my lap. She was a little nauseous from the anesthesia. And she ended up throwing up once. :(
She was pretty scared and I'm sure in pain. She kept crying and saying that she wanted to go home. But before we could leave, she had to drink 10 ounces of fluids. She had a Popsicle, some ice cream and a lot of water. It took a couple of hours, but she finally had taken in enough fluids to go home.
We made it home and she seemed to be doing pretty good. She took a little nap. Then after she woke up she started feeling horrible. Wasn't wanting to eat and feverish.
I hope things get better for her! I feel so so bad! :(
Friday, May 10, 2013
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Our Bad Luck :/
Lately we've just had the worst luck ever!
We've had a lot of plumbing problems in our home lately. We decided to get it all fixed around the beginning of April. Well, It turns out that it's something MUCH worse than what we expected. Our sewer line in our house has been leaking and we had no idea. We were going to get our sand point(well)/pump fixed/replaced. Well, we can't do that now until we get the sewer line fixed. We decided that our best bet was to get a well outside the house instead of the sand point. I don't think we could do a sand point anymore anyway since that spot has been contaminated with sewage. :/ SO...Basically a $2,000 job turned into a $10,000 job. We're trying to save up some money right now to pay for it all.
All I can say is thank God for Seth's parents!!!!! They have let us stay in their home until everything is all fixed. It has been really great! The girls get to spend some much needed time with their Grandma, Papa and Aunt Lisa. And I get to spend some much needed time with my Mom. Since she started working we have barely gotten anytime to hang out and talk. So I guess there's some good news in there! :)
After that great news(sarcasm)... Seth tells me that my inner tire rod on my car was shot and needed replaced. So I haven't been able to use my car. But I did make an appointment to get that fixed next week! Can't wait to drive my car again. I love driving Seth's truck, but I HATE that it's such a gas hog!
In the middle of April we all came down with the stomach flu. It was Samantha's first vomiting episode. Poor girl just kept throwing up. :( I felt sooo bad for her! But she did great running to the toilet when she needed to. Then Ella got it the next day, as did I and Mom. Crappiest couple of days ever! I hope none of us have it again for a long time!
Last week we found out that Ella has Croup and her first ear infection. She was pretty dang miserable!! But seems to be doing 100% better this week! She's not the greatest medicine taker at all! So I find myself hiding it in her milk or her yogurt. Her check up is on Friday.
Yesterday we found out more bad news.
Thursday, May 9th, Samantha is scheduled to get her tonsils and adenoids taken out. This girl has some HUGE tonsils!! Even the ENT said they were "humongous"! Just in the past few months they have been giving her a lot of trouble. She has been snoring, which wakes her up at night, coughing, choking on food, not eating as much and has a little pain. I am sooo nervous for her! The recovery won't be fun, But I will be so grateful when this is all over with. Hopefully she'll be a lot happier girl afterward. :) *fingers crossed*
I don't know about you, but I'm ready for some good luck to head our way!!!!
We've had a lot of plumbing problems in our home lately. We decided to get it all fixed around the beginning of April. Well, It turns out that it's something MUCH worse than what we expected. Our sewer line in our house has been leaking and we had no idea. We were going to get our sand point(well)/pump fixed/replaced. Well, we can't do that now until we get the sewer line fixed. We decided that our best bet was to get a well outside the house instead of the sand point. I don't think we could do a sand point anymore anyway since that spot has been contaminated with sewage. :/ SO...Basically a $2,000 job turned into a $10,000 job. We're trying to save up some money right now to pay for it all.
All I can say is thank God for Seth's parents!!!!! They have let us stay in their home until everything is all fixed. It has been really great! The girls get to spend some much needed time with their Grandma, Papa and Aunt Lisa. And I get to spend some much needed time with my Mom. Since she started working we have barely gotten anytime to hang out and talk. So I guess there's some good news in there! :)
After that great news(sarcasm)... Seth tells me that my inner tire rod on my car was shot and needed replaced. So I haven't been able to use my car. But I did make an appointment to get that fixed next week! Can't wait to drive my car again. I love driving Seth's truck, but I HATE that it's such a gas hog!
In the middle of April we all came down with the stomach flu. It was Samantha's first vomiting episode. Poor girl just kept throwing up. :( I felt sooo bad for her! But she did great running to the toilet when she needed to. Then Ella got it the next day, as did I and Mom. Crappiest couple of days ever! I hope none of us have it again for a long time!
Last week we found out that Ella has Croup and her first ear infection. She was pretty dang miserable!! But seems to be doing 100% better this week! She's not the greatest medicine taker at all! So I find myself hiding it in her milk or her yogurt. Her check up is on Friday.
Yesterday we found out more bad news.
Thursday, May 9th, Samantha is scheduled to get her tonsils and adenoids taken out. This girl has some HUGE tonsils!! Even the ENT said they were "humongous"! Just in the past few months they have been giving her a lot of trouble. She has been snoring, which wakes her up at night, coughing, choking on food, not eating as much and has a little pain. I am sooo nervous for her! The recovery won't be fun, But I will be so grateful when this is all over with. Hopefully she'll be a lot happier girl afterward. :) *fingers crossed*
I don't know about you, but I'm ready for some good luck to head our way!!!!
Wednesday, May 1, 2013
Trying to move forward...
It has been over a month since we found out that our little peanut passed away.
It still feels like we still have so many unanswered questions. The hardest one being that we'll never know what happened. We'll never know why this happened. We'll never know if the baby was a boy or a girl. It's hard not having that closure.
It has hit me pretty hard lately. I have quite a few friends that's due around the same time I was. They're all finding out the genders and posting belly pictures. Although I am incredibly happy for them, it's just hard to not be able to go through all of that with them.
I was so excited to have a itty bitty baby to hold again. I was really excited about nursing-I was going to try my hardest to nurse as long as baby would let me this time around. I was excited to see the girls with the baby-Samantha has been around a few babies recently and she's so sweet with them. I was excited for welcoming the baby into our amazing family. I was excited for all the smiles and laughter that comes with a brand new baby. I was excited for the cute little clothes. I was excited for labor and having that insanely beautiful moment when baby arrives. So many things I was so excited for and it all just got taken from me-like that!
I have been a little stressed out lately. Seth and I have recently talked about trying for another. He said he would like to have one more. And he'd like to start trying again soon. But he said it's completely up to me on what I wanted to do. I'm really not sure what I want to do. I hate that everything is getting put on me. I hate to think about seeing that disappointed look on Seth's face if I don't want to try again. He's such a wonderful Daddy that he deserves a million kids! I just wish I knew what to do. I'm hoping God will help us make the right decision.
As of right now, I'm trying to move forward and I'm just enjoying my time with my beautiful girls and my amazing husband! I was so sick for about 4 months that I wasn't really able to do much of anything with them all and I missed them so, so much!!!
It still feels like we still have so many unanswered questions. The hardest one being that we'll never know what happened. We'll never know why this happened. We'll never know if the baby was a boy or a girl. It's hard not having that closure.
It has hit me pretty hard lately. I have quite a few friends that's due around the same time I was. They're all finding out the genders and posting belly pictures. Although I am incredibly happy for them, it's just hard to not be able to go through all of that with them.
I was so excited to have a itty bitty baby to hold again. I was really excited about nursing-I was going to try my hardest to nurse as long as baby would let me this time around. I was excited to see the girls with the baby-Samantha has been around a few babies recently and she's so sweet with them. I was excited for welcoming the baby into our amazing family. I was excited for all the smiles and laughter that comes with a brand new baby. I was excited for the cute little clothes. I was excited for labor and having that insanely beautiful moment when baby arrives. So many things I was so excited for and it all just got taken from me-like that!
I have been a little stressed out lately. Seth and I have recently talked about trying for another. He said he would like to have one more. And he'd like to start trying again soon. But he said it's completely up to me on what I wanted to do. I'm really not sure what I want to do. I hate that everything is getting put on me. I hate to think about seeing that disappointed look on Seth's face if I don't want to try again. He's such a wonderful Daddy that he deserves a million kids! I just wish I knew what to do. I'm hoping God will help us make the right decision.
As of right now, I'm trying to move forward and I'm just enjoying my time with my beautiful girls and my amazing husband! I was so sick for about 4 months that I wasn't really able to do much of anything with them all and I missed them so, so much!!!
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Our Loss
March 21st, 2013 will be a day that I will never forget.
The girls and I went to my normal 16 week check up. I did the usual weight check and so on. My doctor came into the room and asked how I was feeling. Then she measured my tummy to make sure things are measuring okay, she mentioned that I measured just a little smaller then I should. But she wasn't worried about it. Then she went to listen for the baby's heartbeat. She ended up not being able to find it. I then knew something had to be wrong. She's always able to find the heartbeat right away. She spent a good 5-10 minutes searching for it on the doppler and still couldn't find it. She told me she wanted me to have an ultrasound.
We went to another room for the ultrasound. Then she said the words that will forever be implanted in my head, "Oh shoot...I'm not seeing a heartbeat. I'm so sorry!" I was in absolute shock! I asked all the questions, Why, What happened?? My doctor then told me we may never know what happened, but it's a possibility that my tear from earlier in the pregnancy could have been the cause, but she's not certain. She then told me that she wanted me to have another ultrasound to confirm it. And then she told me that I would have to have an D&C procedure. After the doctor left the room Samantha, bless her heart, says, "Mommy, is the baby gone?". I just lost it!!!
We went downstairs to the radiology place. We waited forever. With two cranky and hungry little girls and a sobbing mother, it was no fun. While we were waiting I decided to make the hardest phone call I have ever made to my husband. It was the hardest 15 minute conversation EVER!
Finally, I got called back to a room for the ultrasound. She confirmed that the baby had no heartbeat. Then she did some measuring and took photos for my doctor. I was told that my doctor would call me in a little while.
I received her phone call about 45 minutes later. She told me the baby measured about 14 weeks. She then proceeded to talk to me about the D&C and we set things up for Tuesday, the 26th.
I've done some research and have asked a few friends that had gone through it. Everyone says it's not too bad physically, but it's pretty tough mentally.
I think the whole hard part right now is waiting. Knowing that I have a dead baby inside me is pretty hard, and not knowing what happened is even harder. I'm still having pregnancy symptoms. I'm still very tired and I've been throwing up every morning. This makes it even tougher that I'm going through all of this for, hate to say it, nothing. I keep thinking to myself, is this something that I did? Is it because I didn't do this or because I did that? What if I did this instead? So many questions and so many unanswered.
Seth has been amazing! We actually sit down and talk about what happened and everything. I'm so glad he's so willing to talk. I know it's hard for the both of us, but I think it's something that we need to do. It helps quite a bit. He's my rock!
Our family and friends that know of what happened have been a true blessing. They've been so great and give us so much love and support. We couldn't get through any of this without them. We love you all so, so much!
I will have an update after my procedure next week.
Please keep us in your prayers!!
The girls and I went to my normal 16 week check up. I did the usual weight check and so on. My doctor came into the room and asked how I was feeling. Then she measured my tummy to make sure things are measuring okay, she mentioned that I measured just a little smaller then I should. But she wasn't worried about it. Then she went to listen for the baby's heartbeat. She ended up not being able to find it. I then knew something had to be wrong. She's always able to find the heartbeat right away. She spent a good 5-10 minutes searching for it on the doppler and still couldn't find it. She told me she wanted me to have an ultrasound.
We went to another room for the ultrasound. Then she said the words that will forever be implanted in my head, "Oh shoot...I'm not seeing a heartbeat. I'm so sorry!" I was in absolute shock! I asked all the questions, Why, What happened?? My doctor then told me we may never know what happened, but it's a possibility that my tear from earlier in the pregnancy could have been the cause, but she's not certain. She then told me that she wanted me to have another ultrasound to confirm it. And then she told me that I would have to have an D&C procedure. After the doctor left the room Samantha, bless her heart, says, "Mommy, is the baby gone?". I just lost it!!!
We went downstairs to the radiology place. We waited forever. With two cranky and hungry little girls and a sobbing mother, it was no fun. While we were waiting I decided to make the hardest phone call I have ever made to my husband. It was the hardest 15 minute conversation EVER!
Finally, I got called back to a room for the ultrasound. She confirmed that the baby had no heartbeat. Then she did some measuring and took photos for my doctor. I was told that my doctor would call me in a little while.
I received her phone call about 45 minutes later. She told me the baby measured about 14 weeks. She then proceeded to talk to me about the D&C and we set things up for Tuesday, the 26th.
I've done some research and have asked a few friends that had gone through it. Everyone says it's not too bad physically, but it's pretty tough mentally.
I think the whole hard part right now is waiting. Knowing that I have a dead baby inside me is pretty hard, and not knowing what happened is even harder. I'm still having pregnancy symptoms. I'm still very tired and I've been throwing up every morning. This makes it even tougher that I'm going through all of this for, hate to say it, nothing. I keep thinking to myself, is this something that I did? Is it because I didn't do this or because I did that? What if I did this instead? So many questions and so many unanswered.
Seth has been amazing! We actually sit down and talk about what happened and everything. I'm so glad he's so willing to talk. I know it's hard for the both of us, but I think it's something that we need to do. It helps quite a bit. He's my rock!
Our family and friends that know of what happened have been a true blessing. They've been so great and give us so much love and support. We couldn't get through any of this without them. We love you all so, so much!
I will have an update after my procedure next week.
Please keep us in your prayers!!
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
15 Weeks
How Far Along: Today I am 15 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013.
Baby's Size/Other Info: Baby's the size of an orange! The average fetus at 15 weeks weighs 2.5 ounces and measures 4 inches -- and his proportions are becoming even more normal, since his legs now outmeasure his arms.
- You probably can't feel it yet, but she's squirming a ton!
- She might even be hiccuping in there.
- She's making lots of progress: her joints and limbs can all move now.
Symptoms: I'm STILL having that yucky gaggy/nausea feeling all day long. I gag at least once a day. No fun! :(
Food Cravings: Meat!
What I'm Excited About: Not feeling like poo all the time!
Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Nothing.
Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs Today's weight: 118lbs
Gender Prediction: GIRL!
Maternity Clothes: Yes and no. I can still wear my "real" pants, but sometimes maternity pants are a bit more comfortable.
NOTES: My next appointment is March 21st.
NOTES: My next appointment is March 21st.
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| 13w3d belly |
Thursday, February 21, 2013
12 Weeks
How Far Along: Today I am 12 weeks 1 day along. Due date September 4th, 2013.
Baby's Size/Other Info: Baby's the size of a plum!
The average fetus at 12 weeks is about 2.1 inches long and .49 ounces. Now that she's got pretty much all her parts, her main job is to keep on growing.
- Most of her critical systems are fully formed!
- She's about to enter the growth and maturation stage, in which her organs and tissues will grow and develop rapidly.
- She's now developing her reflexes -- if you poke her body, she'll likely move.
- She's opening and closing her fingers and curling her toes, too.
- Her brain is developing fast!
Symptoms: I'm still having that yucky gaggy feeling all day long. It just does not want to go away! :(
Food Cravings: McDonalds
What I'm Excited About: To feel like myself again!!
Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Not much. I decided to purchase some Milkies-Milk Savers (http://www.mymilkies.com/milksaver). I've heard great things about these and can't wait to try them!
Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs Today's weight: 118lbs
Gender Prediction: GIRL!
Maternity Clothes: Yes! And I did not miss wearing maternity pants! I loathe them!
NOTES: I had my 12 week check up today(2-21-13). Everything went great. Baby's heartbeat was nice and strong at 168bpm.
NOTES: I had my 12 week check up today(2-21-13). Everything went great. Baby's heartbeat was nice and strong at 168bpm.
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
11 Weeks
How Far Along: Today I am 11 weeks along. Due date September 4th, 2013.
Baby's Size/Other Info: Baby is the size of a lime! Around 11 weeks, you’ll probably notice some subtle changes, a dark, vertical line appearing down the center of your belly (known as the linea nigra). It’s probably tough to feel calm right now, since your hormones are still haywire and you may still be feeling pretty nauseated. But know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel -- just two more weeks left in trimester one!
Baby at 11 weeks
- You can't see it, but she's moving fluidly and gracefully in there.
- Her skin is see-through, but she's on her way to looking more like a baby.
- Her fingers and toes aren't webbed anymore.
- Tooth buds, hair follicles and nail beds are forming.
Symptoms: Some nausea(the gaggy feeling), sleepy, sore back/neck, stress and depression(I haven't mentioned the depression much to anyone and I actually debated about mentioning it here. Basically because I didn't want people to judge me. I didn't want people to think that couldn't handle things or that I'm a horrible Mom/Wife/person and since I plan on talking to my doctor about it next week, I've been considering on trying some anti-depressants. Now, I certainly am NOT a fan of taking those drugs, especially while pregnant. But I can't keep doing this to my family and myself. I don't go anywhere, I don't play with the girls :(, I lay on the couch all day, down in the dumps feeling, just hard to smile and joke around. I really DO believe things have gotten better the past few days. I've been feeling good and have felt happier then I have in months!).
I've also been able to eat really good at dinner the past few days, so that has been nice! I have been only able to have a few bites then be done eating, so its been a nice change! :) I've also been able to FINALLY take my prenatal vitamins without feeling yucky afterward, so that is a plus plus!
I've also been able to eat really good at dinner the past few days, so that has been nice! I have been only able to have a few bites then be done eating, so its been a nice change! :) I've also been able to FINALLY take my prenatal vitamins without feeling yucky afterward, so that is a plus plus!
Food Cravings: None really this week.
What I'm Excited About: 2nd trimester!!!!!! Couple more weeks! :) and doctor's appointment next week!
Something I've done to Prepare for Baby: Since I KNOW she's a girl, I bought a little sister onesie. :)
Weight Gain: Pre-pregnancy weight: 120lbs Today's weight: 117lbs Yay for not losing weight! :)
Gender Prediction: GIRL!
Maternity Clothes: Not yet.
NOTES: (You all may not care about this part..lol) Last week was a horrible week for me. I was (TMI) severely constipated on Wednesday. It got so bad that I actually called my doctor, which I VERY rarely do. Then of course the constipation turned into diarrhea for a few days after. I have never experienced that much pain in my life and I do not wish that upon anyone!
NOTES: (You all may not care about this part..lol) Last week was a horrible week for me. I was (TMI) severely constipated on Wednesday. It got so bad that I actually called my doctor, which I VERY rarely do. Then of course the constipation turned into diarrhea for a few days after. I have never experienced that much pain in my life and I do not wish that upon anyone!
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